Personal Mastery and Meditation Roadblocks.

Blooming in defiance of the season. Blooming in the eyes of adversity. This year, I have been on a spiritual journey. Progress has been made, but right now I feel stuck. Meditating at night has proven to not only be disruptive to my sleep, but everyone else's. My old home is also home to lingering energies from past residences and they are very interested in my new found hobby too. So, what does any good fighter do when faced with adversity? Push through of course, but perhaps also taking on a different perspective or direction.

Yesterday, I meditated during the day. Something I thought I did not want to do, because everything is so much more vivid at night. However, the nighttime vivid imagery is total chaos and the chattering of the mind constant. Needless to say, I did not make much progress. I did discover that I have the ability to tap into my intuition on a very deep level and even communicate with a young spirit living in our home. This was fabulous, but a very different part of me. Now, I want to go deeper within myself. Which I have to be honest, seems like a scary place. The ultimate spiritual goal? Personal mastery and spiritual enlightenment.

 "Personal mastery teaches us to choose. Choosing is a courageous act: picking the results and actions which you will make into your destiny." - Peter Senge

Mastering a skill is something we do from the moment we are born, but mastering ourselves is something few of us even consider as a possibility. I suppose personal mastery is the goal for me. Not only to unlock potential secrets of the universe, but to get to know me on a deeper level than ever before. My new strategy is meditating with my mala beads during the day for an hour everyday. I also wear turquoise and tiger's eye for protection. During the course of the previous week, I have been receiving images of someone very close to me that I believe will pass soon. At first, I was simply seeing his face. Yesterday, I had a nightmare that I was chasing after him and inside this nightmare I knew it would be the last time I would see him. He lay before me on a stretcher with multiple IVs and an intubation tube protruding from his mouth. He was dead.

I rarely dream...ever. This is significant for me. I cannot tell this person about these dreams, because I believe I am being prepared for the inevitable. I believe the wheel of fortune is turning and there is nothing that I can do to stop the events set in motion. Also, think of the pain I would cause my loved one by telling them about my scary nightmare. I refuse to do this.

My first real lesson in meditating has been to let go and to not be afraid.....and to meditate during the day. I would love to hear about your meditation journey in the comment section below.